In Conversation with Esther Perel: On Dialogue
Yesterday I had a raw, open hearted and super vulnerable conversation with the amazing Esther Perel about a situation that unfolded between us over the summer.
Context for this conversation is: in June I posted an infographic on Debate .vs. Dialogue. A few weeks later, I woke up to messages from many people saying that Esther Perel had posted an almost identical infographic. Given the climate at the time and the global awakening to racial injustice that was occurring, many of the people who messaged me contextualised this as an example of white women appropriating black women's work. Some people were angry and wanted answers. So I emailed her. Over the next few months, was a relationship that emerged between us and a deep and rich dialogue between us about conflict, relationships, race, justice and choosing dialogue. The rest, you can watch to see!
There is so much I want to say about this conversation! How terrifying it is to be vulnerable and open (especially when you're talking to a platform of half a million people!) and yet how deeply rewarding it is to stand open in all your vulnerability. How fascinating, even in a conversation about dialogue, that some people in the comments remained determined that we should be taking a more conflict driven approach and intent on shaming us (Esther for white fragility, me for "self gaslighting"). How difficult it is as a result for those of us with big hearts and soft shells to engage in conversations about polarising issues in a world that too often seems harsh and determined to remain in conflict. And yet how desperately the world needs us to do just that.
